H.I.P.

"Hand in Pants." Used by strippers, and customers of lap dances to ask for some special treatment in the back room, i.e. a hand job.

When I went into the back room with the stripper for a lap dance, I asked her if she was down with some H.I.P.

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Doom Spoon

This is the large cooking spoon your mom used to beat your ass with when you were bad. Often made of plastic and large enough to whale on 2 asses at one time, the doom spoon was able to withstand years of abuse. The doom spoon typically came with holes in it to prevent wind resistance and increase velocity, pre-impact. The doom spoon also often was used as a projectile when the target could not be reached, e.g. when the target climbs a tree to avoid the beating, the doom spoon may be thrown at the ass to inflict low-level pain.

The doom spoon typically has a 15 year shelf life. Once the child turns 15, the doom spoon becomes more humorous than painful. The 16th year of life is often referred to as "the doom spoon-free year."

Mothers across the world switched from wooden doom spoons to plastic in the early part of the 20th century in order to prevent splintering.

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