David

Davids are handsome assholes who will never love you back. Far too sweet and kind, they'll remain your friend for the rest of your live, as they are too cowardly to compromise to anything more than that. Perfect in glasses, they never fail to make you laugh with either really stupid or really smart jokes, just to make you even more depressed as you are so out of their league it makes want to kill yourself. If you ever see a tall, handsome David with large shoulders, run for your life or you'll end up falling in love.

Person #1: OMG me and David just locked each at each other.
Person #2: Just forget it, he's no worth your time.