Squirrell Syndrome

Pertaining to a lack of composure of the bowels; vis.: bum-wee; esp. following a period of extensive alcohol intake beginning circa age 14.

Symptoms include, but are not limited to: Bum wee; corrosive flatulence; the inability to travel more than 20m without requiring defecation; sonorous and voluble digestion; the requirement to eat healthily for brief but ultimately insignificant periods; Chicken Cottage.

A recent 7-year study has found no medical cure.

Remarkable similarity to Irritable Bowel Syndrome

Noted for increased prevalence in Lincolnshire, UK.

Mike: I've got Bum Wee.

James: Must be Squirrell Syndrome. Chicken Cottage?

Mike: Yeah.

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