double entendre

A word or phrase with two interpretations, one of which is ribald.

Dr. Evil: By "Caliber", I mean both the size of their gun barrels and the high quality of their character...it's a homonym.

Number Two: No, Dr. Evil. It's called a "double entendre".

Dr. Evil: SILENCE, NUMBER TWO!!

(Number Two falls into a firy pit)

Number Two: AAAHHHHHH!!!

123👍 126👎

chicks with dicks

See the movie "Clerks" by director Kevin Smith to hear this phrase in a good context.

It's hermaphroditic porn! It's "Chicks with Dicks 47".

97👍 51👎

bumper thumper

Derived from bible thumper

An automobile that:


* Is valued at less than $1000.00

* Is covered with more than a dozen bumper stickers preaching an ideal you disagree with

* Travels at half the speed limit and tends to linger between lanes

"I'll be late for work unless this fucking bumper thumper gets out of my way."

6👍 10👎

william hung

One of the most brilliant young minds in America.

Formulated a plan where he would gain fame and fortune by singing horribly. His plan worked and can now retire.

William Hung did not gain fame by accident. It was all according to his plan.

429👍 164👎

anal conversion

The act of converting rounded-off figures in one system of measurement to another to far too many digits.

Astronomer to local reporter: With only eye witness accounts, you can't be very accurate, but I'd say the meteorite was one hundred metric tons and exploded a five thousand meters altitude.

Newspaper article: From eyewitness accounts, local astronomer Dr. Hilbert pinned down the rock as being 220,400 lb. and exploding at 16,404 ft altitude.

Astronomer, reading the article: That's anal conversion! I sound like a charlatan!

10👍 4👎

sovereignty

Should mean "Independence and self-government" not just "government" because that meaning is already taken.

Ron: We will transfer sovereignty to the Iraqi people.

Luke: Wouldn't it be better to say we will facilitate sovereignty for the Iraqi people?

59👍 30👎

rubberneck

To drive slowly by a car accident (or site having emergency vehicles) and turn the head to see anything gory.

This act exacerbates traffic delays.

Crews pulled the wreckage off the highway, but drivers continued to rubberneck and cause delays.

797👍 207👎