VCR

Imagine a DVD, but fucking huge.

Ace: Hey dad, can I borrow your VCR machine?
Dad: Why?
Ace: So I can fucking sell it on Ebay and buy a Netflix subscription.

Presidential Election

Two rich old white perverts try putting fake votes in a box to rule a country.

Ace: Who will you be voting for in the Presidential Election?
Trump: A wall.

64👍 17👎

Anime

The only excuse for lesbians to watch cartoons while still sounding mature

Ace: Do you watch anime?
Lily: OH MY GOD GON AND *insert gibberish* KISSED THEN STABBED EACH OTHER OH MY GOD

3👍 6👎

Bob

That old man with a pumpkin for a stomach who asks if you have some trail mix.

Ace: Hello.
Bob: Got nuts?