cracker mansion

Typically a new-construction home, usually located on the outskirts of suburban sprawl. The occupants used to be rednecks, but they now have better paychecks. Their old house featured a car up on cinder blocks and a small garden inside a truck tire laid flat. The new house, probably ranch style, features a powerboat and two ATVs with a burbling concrete fountain with a little boy peeing out front. The front door will have an oval frosted pane window with a faux-bronze inlay and the interior décor will focus on the large screen TV. There will be at least twenty identical cracker mansions nearby. Note: the neo-colonial-style version of this home costs substantially more and may involve soaring foyers, brick facades in front of the house and Styrofoam (EIFS) on the side and back of the house. If invited to an up-scale cracker mansion, be sure to bring blush wine.

Five years ago, this was a corn field, but now it's filled with cracker mansions.

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