pompey

A dwelling place on the south coast of England. Famous for the inbreeding of its population, which numbers almost 200,000 yet is reckoned to be completely related through just three generations. The average age of pregnancy is 13 although that is just an average.

When the Pompey football team host a home game and as many as 1,000 Millwall fans turn up, it is reckoned that the average IQ of the city rises by as much as 30 per cent during those two hours.

Pompey inspired Charles Darwin’s theory when he returned from his famous voyage on HMS Beagle and wrote the Origin of Species. The people of Pompey were he reckoned the missing link. Knuckles trailing along the ground wearing grooves in the pavement seemed to bear this theory out.

It was following a bombing raid on Pompey that the British Government considered paying the Luftwaffe for making such great improvements to the city.

Pompey is city of slums and inbred inhabitants

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