Christian Rock

A sub-genre of rock that will always be second-rate due to atheists' superior headbanging skills.

Guy 1: Hey wanna listen to some Christian rock?
Guy 2: Sorry, dude, atheists are just too good at headbanging.
Guy 1: How come they're so good?
Guy 2: Christians believe in standing upright at all times, like Jesus.
Guy 1: Jesus wasn't standing upright when he was dragging his cross.
Guy 2: Yeah, well, look what happened to him.
Guy 1: So you're saying that lack of faith in a divine power will make one more hardcore?
Guy 2: For a beginner you're pretty good at disbelief. Kudos.

46👍 29👎

Dane Cook

Anybody with a boner for Kool-Aid.

Dane Cook: "He would come crashing through your fuckin' wall and be like, 'Oh yeah! Oh yeah! OOOOOOOH YEAH!'"

5 hours later Dane Cook is chilling in his LA penthouse with his girlfriend and his Kool-Aid. Confusing much?

10👍 17👎

Poon shredder

A simply magnificent man who destroys the pussy and is looked up to by everyone

"Jimmy is a real poon shredder, bro"

1👍 1👎