spouse without benefits

noun: a heterosexual companion of the opposite sex with whom one spends a great deal of time and shares a deep level of comfort but has no intimate relations. Usually both members in a without benefits union are single. The relationship is also often characterized by sarcasm and other behaviors typical to a married couple who have been together many years.

I can't find a date to bring to the BBQ, so I will bring my spouse without benefits.

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