hoe-mance

A sickeningly sentimental and exclusive too-close friendship 'twixt two adult females.

Jeez, Deborah and Lisa's pukey we-hate-men hoe-mance makes my teeth itch!

attention shite

Also 'attention shit' for the world outside the UK and Ireland. An act of defecation by a pet dog or cat, designed to get the attention of the owner/master, who has done (or not done) something to annoy said pet.

Jesus! The cat's dropped an attention shite in the laundry hamper again! Did you forget to feed her!?

Fawlty Syndrome

A curious phenomenon whereby an individual will find themselves (in) a job or profession, involving activities and duties contrary to their personalities and preferences - such as a hotelier who has no liking or even patience for people.

My kid's teacher seems to hate children! Fawlty Syndrome, who could explain it?

bastering

A corruption of the colloquial nonword adjective 'bastarding,' commonly used by one in the throes of a sudden effusive rage.

Most frequently pronounced without the g, i.e. basterin'.

How many fucking times do I have to trip over that cunting rug before someone MOVES the bastering thing?!?

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wondow

A metaphysical window to something or somewhere wonderful or wondrous. The sort of thing you might find described in supernatural themed novels or in the conversation of stoners.

I dunno what the hell ya dropped in my drink, but I floated through a wondow and didn't wanna come back!

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witherage

The age at which one begins to wither. Exactly which age this is varies broadly between individuals, and is subject to genes, environmental and lifestyle factors.

Andy, you're 35 now - isn't it time to think about saving for your fast-approaching witherage?

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horshit

Merely a contraction of the existing word 'horseshit,' altering the spelling to match the common pronunciation.

Yeah, she was gonna throw me out, so I told her I love her and I'm sorry and all that horshit...

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