Crocodile Shears

noun:

One of the most appaling torture devices to ever be implimented. This is an iron pincer with hemicylindrical blades that formed a long narrow tube when closed together.

The inside was lined with sharp spikes (which are often heated red-hot before use). This device was clamped to the victim's penis and once the penis has been "cooked" enough, the penis was ripped off.

When I found out what crocodile shears were I barfed.

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Backdoor Pirate

noun:

1. A pirate whose preferred method of pillaging is though the backdoor.

2. Someone who engages in the giving of anal sex.

3. A common name for a hypothetical homosexual piece of pornography. However there is no evidence to suggest that there is either a movie or a magazine which has the words "Backdoor Pirate" anywhere in it.

#1:
Rodion: "I am a backdoor pirate."

Sarah: "Eeek!"

#2:
Joey: "HAahah I bet your dad stars in Backdoor Pirates 7!"

Rodion: "You fucktard...there's no such thing!"

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Backdoor Pirate

noun:
1. A pirate whose prefered method of pillaging is through the backdoor.

2. Someone who engages in the giving of anal sex.

3. A common name for a hypothetical work of homosexual pornography, yet there is no evidence of something with the words "Backdoor Pirate" ever existing in the pornographic world.

#1:
Rodion: "I am a backdoor pirate."

Sarah: "Eeek!"

#2:
Joey: "Ahahahah I bet your dad stared in Backdoor Pirates 7!"

Rodion: "You fucktard! There's no such thing!"

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poundatron

A robotic device (sometimes, but not always of a sexual nature) which pounds.

While officialy of a robotic nature, it is often used to describe anything that pounds, whether it is of organic or synthetic build.

"A jackhammer is a poundatron." -Synthetic example.

"A was a destructive poundatron last night." -Organic example.

"The city was pounded into rubble by the massive poundatron." -Bonus example.

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piss battle

A piss battle can be one of several types of piss oriented competition.

1. The contestants simply see who pisses farther...or pisses more. AKA a pissing contest.

2. The two contenders attach their urinary tracts via some form of tube with the use of a waterproofing substance and a glue of some sort. The two people proceed to drink a defined amount of a liquid (say one gallon per person or something of the sort)...then the waiting begins.

The two people then begin to piss. As the urge to urinate increases an epic piss battle begins to ensue. The golden liquid will then be pushed between the two people until eventually one of the combatant's bladders bursts. (More liquid may be ingested by combatants if a stalemate ensues or if not enough liquid is present for a bladder bursting...or surrender.)

History: Piss battles have been an effective way of testing the manhood of males for centuries. Since the prowess in battle is directly linked to the genitals of the combatant, the winner is said to be more sexually potent then the loser.

Piss battles rarely end with death as it takes a surprising amount of pressure to burst the bladder. The ones that DO end in death are particularly heinous. The victim will endure crippling pain and if untreated immediately setpic shock.

Piss battles are known to cause cancer in the state of California.

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backdoor sledgehammer

This can mean many things, all of which are (as the name implies) destructive to the recipient's anal opening.

Noun: Something which is used to inflict massive anal damage (broomhandle, monster dildo, armadillo, shoe, etc.)
Noun: The actual technique of using a tool (as described above) to pound the victim's anal opening into submission.

"After being tied down to prevent escape, the man was given a thorough backdoor sledgehammer."

"I will use this lampshade as a backdoor sledgehammer if you come near my house again."

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cum magnet

A magnet for cum.

Wether or not a scientific device actually exists which can attract semenal fluids to itself, a cum magnet can simply be a slut or a prostitute.

1. "Wow...that hoe is a cum magnet."

2. Shortly after designing the worlds most powerful cum magnet, the scientists behind this marvel quite suddenly had all of their semen torn from their bodies.

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