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The art of taking Mark Twain "Quotes & Sayings" and putting your own twist on them to confuse some people and amuse others.
When I Maintwain on people, they get "the deer in the headlights" look on their face and walk away in shame. Maintwain!
2👍 18👎
A woman who wears next to nothing during the winter while wearing Ugg Boots.
"Damn! It's 30 damn degrees outside and that chick is wearing booty shorts with those damn Ugg Boots... What a Fucking UGG SLUT!!! "
12👍 22👎
A person that sometimes laughs so uncontrollably at the most ridiculous things that they tend to snort, giggle and often times spray their beverage of choice either through their nose, out of their mouth, or both at the same time and on to the nearest inanimate object.
"Did you guys hear about Kristyn?" She was reading one of my facebook statuses the other day and it made her spray a diet pepsi through her nose and mouth and right on to her computer screen. While that was happening, she was laughing so hard that she started to snort. We need to keep a close eye on her. She might be turning into a snort-a-saurus. I hope it's not contagious.
5👍 16👎
A person that sometimes laughs so uncontrollably at the most ridiculous things that they tend to snort, giggle and often times spray their beverage of choice either through their nose, out of their mouth, or both at the same time and on to the nearest inanimate object.
"Did you guys hear about Kristyn?" She was reading one of my facebook statuses the other day and it made her spray a diet pepsi through her nose and mouth and right on to her computer screen. While that was happening, she was laughing so hard that she started to snort. We need to keep a close eye on her. She might be turning into a snort-a-saurus. I hope it's not contagious.
3👍 18👎
A person that sometimes laughs so uncontrollably at the most ridiculous things that they tend to snort, giggle and often times spray their beverage of choice either through their nose, out of their mouth, or both at the same time and on to the nearest inanimate object.
"Did you guys hear about Kristyn?" She was reading one of my facebook statuses the other day and it made her spray a diet pepsi through her nose and mouth and right on to her computer screen. While that was happening, she was laughing so hard that she started to snort. We need to keep a close eye on her. She might be turning into a snort-a-saurus. I hope it's not contagious.
3👍 19👎
Thornaments are Christmas tree ornaments that stab you while you are hanging them on your tree.
Where's Jay? He's at the E.R. He had a really bad thornaments accident while trimming his tree.
3👍 8👎
Any girl that is a specialist in the taste and consistency of sperm. Especially, as it is applied to her skin.
I had a date last weekend with a spermatologist. She was a dropout from cosmetology school. She failed at everything except facials. She's a real spermatologist.
8👍 11👎