hair metal

A form of 80's teenybopper music made primarily by effeminate men wearing makeup and dressed like women, with stereotypical 80's big hair. After an initial wave of it fizzled out in 1987, it resurfaced just a couple of years later with a short-lived new breed of even lamer bands. Success in hair metal was primarily achieved through placing primary importance on the ability to pose for the camera, and comprising your band with simpletons with little or no musical ability, much less creativity. Once the formula was in place, it was just a matter of finding gullible losers to buy into the swindle. MTV, which started out as a music television channel, obliged, making this subgenre of wimp rock popular at the time. Perhaps the most enjoyable aspect of hair metal was it's juvenile lyrics. Never intentionally bad, the lyrical wasteland was a direct result of the limited intellectual capacities of the band members.

Hair metal was made popular by bands like Poison, Warrant, Winger, Slaughter, White Lion, Trixter, Skid Row, Motley Crue, Kix, and the Bulletboys.

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poser metal

Lame pop music performed by feminine men that wear makeup and have no historical knowledge of heavy metal.

Poser metal reared it's ugly head in the mid-1980's. Corporate television producers have tried to re-write rock history and give this type of teeny bopper bubblegum credibility within pop culture history. It was a joke then, is a joke now. Practioneers of this genre include Poison, Warrant, Winger, Slaughter, Skid Row, Motley Crue.

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