Screen door shit

Diarrhea so runny and projecting at a high velocity that it’ll fly right through a screen door.

“I ate at the Mexican place and got the screen door shits so bad before I even left the parking lot.” Jayson

Poopie Snatch

When you pull your cock out the ass and shove into the pussy.

“I gave that bitch a poopie snatch!” -Jayson

Uniturd

One big giant turd that clearly should have been multiple turds.

Meagan: Where’s the plunger!

Jayson: Why do you need a plunger?
Meagan: I backed up the toilet with my giant uniturd...

Doodie Finger

When you go to wipe your ass and you get shit on your finger.

“I had the screen door shits this morning and when I went to wipe my ass, I got doodie finger.” Jayson

Poo Lube

Fingering someone in the ass, only using poo as lube.

Jayson: I am going to stick a finger up your ass and only use poo lube.

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Hemoglobin Lube

Using period blood as lube.

“I’ll fuck the shit outta that bloody cunt, I don’t give a fuck. Use some hemoglobin lube!” - Jayson

Hermufferdink

Being flustered by the quarks of a corporation.

Sometimes I don’t fucking get why Apple does what Apple does, it makes me all hermufferdink!