South Franklin Gummer

(sowth frayn•klin gum•er)
Noun

The act of receiving oral stimulation from A homeless denizen with a crippling meth addiction in the Alaska State Capitol. To be a Proper Franklin St. Gummer, said denizen must be devoid of teeth, though not entirely necessary.

Oh, man, when I took a tour up to Alaska, last summer, I got to experience what the locals call a South Franklin Gummer!

Alabama mud snake

An Alabama mud snake, like it’s shorter, smaller cousin, the mud snake, is brown, usually, in color, It can also be mustard yellow, green, or red, and black, if it is ill… The Alabama mud snake, is the larger, and more aggressive version, of your typical mud snake. Usually spanning from 13, to 16 inches long, it can be as big around as a dollar bill, join the end to end, Though there have been incidents reported where an Alabama mud snake was found to be anywhere from 10, to 15 inches around. Reports on this, however, are dubious, at best, and are better ignored, then to be believed. Being of the Anguis genus, Latin name Sternus Anguis, It belongs to the same branch of month snakes as the German mud Python, the Taiwanese mud snake, the Japanese mud snake, and your garden variety mud snake. It is not, however, at all related to the mud viper, or mud rattler, as is commonly misconceived. Indications that you were dealing with an Alabama mud snake are, again, it being anywhere from 13 to 15 inches long, anywhere from eight, to 10 inches in diameter, as well as a ceiling it’s victim with a rather pungent odor or. Common methods of disposal are as follows; Do not, under any circumstances, attempt to flush the snake. It will put up a fight, and cause you and your loved ones on ending misery, for at least 15 to 30 minutes. Instead, kill it with a plunger handle, dismember it with said plunger, then safely dispose of it in single ply grocery bags, in your neighbors trashcan.

Thank God we managed to kill that Alabama mud snake, now let’s go ahead and follow the protocols and dump it in Cletus’s trashcan next door!

minty breeder

Adverb; The act of freezing ones semen in an ice cube tray, then, placing said ice cubes in the vaginal or anal tract of your partner.

She said she likes ice play and breeding, so I gave her the Minty Breeder

Aurizzm

(ah•rizz•um) noun, adjective; def: Using one’s social handicaps in an attempt to charm another person into a friendship, social contract, or relationship; either romantic or physical.

Fig.1) “-asked her if she wanted to take a ride in my race car bed, and of course she said yes! Aurizzm hard at work baby!”

Fig.2) “My best friend and I bonded over a shared brand of granny underwear.” “Flexed your Aurizzm, I see?”

Anamorophilia

Anamorophilia(an•am•oh•row•fee•Lee•uh) noun/lifestyle:

Being possessed of or developing an intimate physical or sexual attraction for somebody who is not attracted to you.

Anamorophiliac can be used to describe someone who possesses this particular lifestyle habit.

A: Dude, bro’s a simp! she doesn’t even like him.

B: I think the term you’re looking for is Anamorophiliac.

A: tf does that mean?
B:…
A:?
B: Bro’s a simp.