A John Deere loving, pole smoking, Wild Turkey drinking, bald headed drag queen from Indiana.
I went to the tractor pulls and kicked the crap out of a group of "amicks" wearing John Deere hoodies.
38👍 19👎
To wake up in the morning after a night of magical rainbow sex (back door loving) and tap into that hairy ass once again for continued chocolate friction pleasure.
Jeremy was abruptly awakened to being ass-pounded by Eric. "Damn Eric next time you want to re-butt me, ASK!"
To be ass raped in the darkness of a corn field in Iowa. Usually happens to unsuspecting business men who venture out too far from the safety of their hotels.
I was on a feed mill start up in Iowa with the new guy Steve and after work we went to the bar with a bunch of farmers. The next morning Steve woke up with kernels of corn in his hair and had a raw anus. I said, "Damn Steve you got Corn Husked!"
70👍 26👎
To have your anal region completely violated in a "back 40" location in Texas. These southern attacks usually involve Midwestern Yankee business men who truly believe the Civil war is over.
Upon returning from a business trip to Texas, my roommate Steve was walking very bull-legged. I asked him, "What the hell happened to you?" He said, "While under the spell of a southern girl's accent, her brothers took me out to the back 40 and Longhorned me!" "Damn Steve, I told you not to mess with Texas!"
25👍 2👎
The most understanding, caring, patient, loving and gorgeous husband in the world who will do anything for his wife at anytime!
My husband cleaned the house, did the grocery shopping, folded the laundry and made dinner all before I got home. After dinner, he rubbed my feet! He is such a Kyle.
52👍 15👎