Indianapolis Colts

A shit excuse for a football team. They were once a great team that played in Memorial stadium in Baltimore, but they were traded to the owner of the Los Angeles Rams, a drunk that inherited millions from his family assets in order to buy a football team. His poor economic decisions and his lack of testicles were key forces in moving the Colts to Indianapolis, a small town in Indiana with no prior ties to football and no ties to anything worth notable at all. The team continued to suck so bad that they were given the first draft pick in 1998, picking future MVP quarterback Peyton Manning, one of the best quarterbacks of all time. Since then the team has gone to many Superbowls under Manning and it's fan base flourished, despite the rest of team lacking of any skill notable for professional football. They continue to exceed in the NFL, but are estimated to dissolve once Peyton Manning leaves his post to pursue becoming an announcer, probably for CBS.

In a survey in the New York Times, approximately 84% of all Colts fans are unable to locate the state of Indiana on a map of the United States.

The "great" city of Indianapolis sports many things other cities can't live up to, such as the Colts, the Daytona 500, and the Ku Klux Klan.

All Indianapolis Colts fans are white.

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