Lumberjack crap

When you take a shit and the turd stands up straight like a log, then you pretend you're a lumberjack and push it over.

Max: Hey I just took a lumberjack crap

Joe: Did you push it over like you're supposed to?
Max: Course I did

Nemo Tanking

Replacing the tip of the penis with the head of a clown fish and ejaculating through the mouth

Where's Joe?
He's in his room, his clown fish died so he's just doing some Nemo tanking.

9👍 2👎

Zip wipe

The process of getting a strand of 6-10 squares of toilet paper then placing one end in the toilet bowl, and the other end running through your crack and over your shoulder, then you flush the toilet and let it all zip through your crack, cleaning it all in one smooth motion like a zip line.

Joe: I have 6-10 squares left
Max: are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Joe: Fuck yeah
Max & Joe: Zip wipe!!

4👍 2👎