tour my first apartment

Performing cunilingus with or vaginally penetrating your own mother's vagina, which is where you came from aka your 'first apartment'.

"So Emperor Caligula, your mom's pregnant right?"
"Indeed. And it's no wonder with how much I tour my first apartment."
"I'm going to smile and nod so you won't have me executed."

kitty jenga

Piling objects atop a sleeping cat in turn. Bigger objects give more points, but the game is over when the cat wakes up! The one who wakes up the cat or who makes the stack tumble looses.

"Fluffy was not very pleased to wake up to a game of kitty jenga."

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