giggle stick

(n). One of the most annoying toys ever. Emerged from the 1970s, it was a plastic yellow stick that made a spastic sound by tilting it on end, back and forth. The first sound would be higher pitched and the second one was lower. Sounded like a cow on helium.

It would sound like "Ow, ewwwww...ow, ewwwww..."

In the "just a buck store", I found a cheap imitation of that old annoying giggle stick.

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butt billboard

synonym for ass billboard. Blatant advertising on the rump of a pair of girl's shorts or sweatpants.

She was standing there in the mall, in plain view, wearing a butt billboard that said "Nasty".

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celluwhore

(N). 1. A person who talks on a cell phone in an inappropriate place, causing a disruption to the people around them, thus negating the purpose of talking on one in the first place.

2. One who talks loudly on a cell phone in a public place about trivial stuff to feel/sound important. Used as a fake symbol of status.

I was shopping in the grocery aisle when I was bombarded by this loud obnoxious celluwhore who was shouting his grocery list into the phone.

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four figure salary

(n). Any money in a given year, made working at a variety of low-paying (often per hour, without benefits) jobs.

Categories of jobs include (but not limited to): manual labor, seasonal empoyment, temporary employment, per diem (on call basis), and food work.

Highly skilled and educated people often have to take jobs like these in difficult times.

Hey Will, some friends and I are flying down to Rio for two weeks for a vacation. Do you want to join us?

Sorry, John. I won't be able to, due to my four figure salary.

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charity crapper

(n). One who habitually uses a public bathroom in a public place such as a library on a daily basis to relieve their load themselves. Quite often, the offender leaves the area foul smelling.

Every day at 3 Pm, Max comes into the library to free his load. Why doesn't he go home and use his own toilet? He's a charity crapper.

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charity crapper

(n). 1. One who goes to parties, functions, and other events just for the freebies, but doesn't bring anything to eat/drink. 2. A guy/gal who goes out to eat, and when the time comes to divvy up the bill, says they are short.
3. Someone that does not reciprocate.

"Hey Paul, should I invite Bill?" "Oh, no, man! Not that charity crapper!"

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tap dance typist

tap dance typist (n). One who types so noisily on a PC that you can hear them from across the room (even fifty feet away). The more public the setting, the more annoying the situation. The typing often sounds as if the typing is mimicking a tap dance routine--with the enter/return button getting a big "stomp".

How are we going to get any work done in the library, Jane? That tap dance typist has been putting on a public show for over an hour!

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