blushworthy

An adjective to describe anything worth blushing about.

Bottom hardly ever does anything blushworthy, but last week he was sleeping too close to the edge and fell off the bed.

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Scotch-tape skies

A weather condition frequently seen in family photographs of a certain age, brought on by the ill-considered use of Scotch tape in scrapbooks and picture frames.

I found a photograph of Grandma sitting in her roadster under Scotch-tape skies.

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hand hula

A dance you can do with your hands while sitting at a stop light.

When Teenage Dream came on I wanted to jump out of my seat, but because I was driving I had to settle for the hand hula.

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The Bourne Redundancy

1. The title of Matt Damon’s new spy thriller.

2. May refer to any extraneous or inferior movie sequel.

“You seen that new Matt Damon flick?”

“The Bourne Redundancy? Derivative, man.”

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Begmore

1. A utopian distiller of single-malt scotch that would be located on the Isle of Islay if it existed.

2. A figurative single-malt scotch that, when consumed by house pets, causes them to demand more treats and attention than they deserve.

“Your dog won't keep his nose out of my dinner. He’s been hitting the Begmore too hard.”

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veggie del norte

1. vegetables that have migrated so far north they have become frozen.
2. Any kind of frozen vegetable.

Bottom doesn’t have any fresh salad fixings, but he can serve veggie del norte anytime.

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extravirg

One of those annoying virgins who is super-friendly

Bottom went to his class reunion, which had been organized by an extravirg with nothing better to do.

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