Rug Custard

When ejaculation is left on your partner's pubes.

"She was being grumpy so I slipped her a calming length and left her with Rug Custard"

Dragging a lady

A kind of posh wank.

Using lipstick on your primary hand and googly eyes, then masturbating with the hand.
Dirty bitch spits too...

1:"What you doing tonight?"
2:"Dragging a lady."
1:"Oh a posh wank!"