Crystal

The moment when the awkward turtle isn't that awkward and that in itself is extremely awkward. Also a hot strong mama with two strong thumbs and a love of Clydesdale horses or well hung Spanish men.

"I fucked a Crystal. Hurt like hell. Then I realised she was a turtle. AWWWWWKWWWWAAARD!"
"STTTTTUUUMMMMMBBBBLLLLLLLEEEEEE - A fat pokemon who is lazy and generally roles down hills".
"Can you bring me my chapstick? No use one from the school nurse. Eww that's gross, she's like, a Crystal and stuff".

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