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Darien

A small town located in the southwestern corner of Connecticut. Darien is situated in Fairfield County, which contains some of the most wealthy and impoverished towns and cities in the entire country. Statistically, the majority of the town is W.A.S.P.y (White Anglo Saxon Protestant), although there is the occasional Jew or Asian around. Most adolescent Darien residents identify strongly with their town, whose mascot is the "Blue Wave", and aren't even offended when outsiders call them "D-Baggers". Darien is very well-known for its lacrosse team, which has accomplished infinite success in the past. Most teens attend Darien High School, which can barely be considered a public school. Those who do not attend 'the high school' are shipped off to some of the most elite boarding schools in New England, such as Loomis Chaffee, Exeter, Deerfield, and Rosemary Choate. Those who choose to live at home will attend any of the local private schools, including Brunswick, St. Luke's School, Greenwich Academy, Fairfield Preparatory, Greens Farms Academy, or Convent of the Sacred Heart. On the whole, Darienites define themselves by their material wealth, which is usually reflected by their country club membership(s), home size and location, number and brand of cars owned, and quality of their wardrobe. Darien is most well-known for its coastal areas, which are monopolized by those who live in such private associations as Tokeneke, Noroton Bay, and Delafield Island, to name a few. Those who are raised in Darien generally begin drinking and experimenting with narcotics before they begin high school, which is probably why so many of them are sent to rehab or receive DUIs before they go off to college. Despite all of this, Darien teens have a glorious time in high school. In fact, most pride themselves on how much they can drink, which is a considerable amount. In terms of what there is to do, many individuals choose to go into New York City on the weekends, where most of their parents work during the week. O.A.R., Dave Matthews, and moe. concerts in the city are a town-wide event. Norwalk and Stamford are the two cities that neighbor Darien, and are (for the most part) dangerous and horrible places that are only worthwhile for the mall and a couple movie theaters. If you ever want an idea of the "Darien Dress Code", walk into the Darien Sport Shop, which is equipped with a Burberry section, a Ralph Lauren Polo Room, an extensive Vineyard Vines selection, a Lily Pulitzer area, and an array of over-priced skis, snowboards, lacrosse equipment, and Northface apparel. In any case, Darien is not the real world, which is why it is such a perfect bubble!

Tom: Hey, I'm from Darien, how about you?
Harry: I'm from Fairfield County too!
Tom: Really? Where?
Harry: I'm from Norwalk.
Tom: I see... Oh, look, there's my driver!

Kerry: Sally, where do you belong?
Sally: Tokeneke Club, and you?
Kerry: Weeburn... my parents didn't bother with the beach club.

by Caitlin Roster April 3, 2007

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