Hose monster

n.
a promiscuous woman who is dangerous to date long-term or marry because she has extreme emotional baggage and a first-class attitude.

Men, beware of these hose monsters who look pretty now because you'll regret it later when you marry her.

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bullpen

in dating, this is a lineup of associates who specialize in your tastes. as in baseball the manager needs a starting pitcher, middle reliever and a closer. in dating, some people various have fetishes and tastes. a bullpen satisfies an individual's various sexual needs. a bullpen is also a good way to keep a man from becoming pussywhipped.

tom leykis tells all his sons avoid girlfriends and instead to keep a bullpen. he's a smart guy who knows everything men need to know in order to get laid.

Tom: Sometimes I'm a chubby chaser, sometimes I like asians, and sometimes I like MILFs. My bullpen has these types along with the hotties.

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station

interj.
expression indicating one's approval of a worthy event.

n.
short, exterrestrial alien geniuses, who also have excellently huge martian butts.

1. Bill: You are most worthy of your reputation, plus you have an excellently huge martian butt!
Station: Station.

2. Please give a warm welcome for Station's most bodacious creations- the Good Robot Usses!

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no spank bank directory

a list you keep of the two baggers, psycho women, feminists, butterfaces, reverse butterfaces and other such women you shouldn't date. this no spank bank directory can be shared with other guys in your posse to forewarn them that these women are not date-worthy.

i do my fellow men a service by keeping a no spank bank directory to protect men from these hose monsters who can get basic instinct on you.

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spank bank directory

n.
long term memory bank of a person's favorite sexually stimulating memories with some fair internal organization for the individual to regularly consult for sexual self-stimulation when needed.

Since I was old enough, my spank bank directory contains almost all my memories of panty & thong sightings even dating back to the earliest days I've learned to wank and I still continue to use them to this day.

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Toilet Sloppy

adj.
indicates a woman's tacky granny underwear being pubicly displayed in a manner which defies male appreciation of an otherwise welcome sight were the underwear sexier. Some examples are obvious panty lines, or zebra panty print patterns showing through light colored pants, or unbelted pants showing the woman's grannies as she bends over.

-Before the thong, women had what were called panty bulges, or a term I use, "toilet sloppy".

-If I had the chance to peep a woman's underwear, I won't take it if they're toilet sloppy.

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courtesy wipe

you nut on a girl and you use her hair to wipe your cock.

Jane is such a newb; after giving me the most phenomenal blowjob ever she didn't even have the common gall to offer me a courtesy wipe.

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