Breault Code

/brō kōd/

Not to be confused with bro code, the breault code, until now, has been the unwritten set of discourtesies performed by that one guy in your group who cannot be trusted with your girlfriend:

1. Never be loyal to your friends unless it benefits you; YOU are your #1 breault
2. Hoes before bros. Never forget this
3. The best poon is plundered poon
4. If your buddy has a girlfriend you are interested in or have jerked off to a photo of, start casually hitting on her immediately to plant the seed that you want to plant your seed
5. Always keep things cool with your buddy, while making sure to slowly turn up the heat with his girl
6. Whenever you are out with your buddy and his girl, always flex on him by buying as many rounds as possible for him and his girl
7. You don’t fuck with your buddy’s girl, unless he is out of town for at least 24 hours or is asleep, at which time your buddy has waived all rights to his girl and she is considered a forfeiture. If this opportunity presents itself, jettison the friendship with your buddy and make your move; she’s yours now
8. Once you've taken your buddy's girl to Pound Town, don't tell your buddy but feel free to tell his friends. He won't find out
9. If you see your buddy out and he asks any questions, deny everything and ghost
10. Win. High-five, breault

"Watch your girlfriend, man. That dude she is talking to is all about the Breault Code"

Misanthropophilia

A state or condition characterized by the love of the hatred of humankind. See also: misanthropy; schadenfreude

She loved having deep conversations in which she was allowed to joyfully express her total distrust and general disappointment in humankind: it's not every day she meets people who understand her misanthropophilia.

Cheatmooch

1. noun An adulterer who feigns loyalty to, while scavenging the resources of, his or her oblivious significant other : cheating whore

2. verb To plunder the assets of a naïve lover while surreptitiously sleeping with others

Guy #1: "Can you believe Tom is still with Amy? She's just using him for his money and has been cheating on him with Ken for months!"
Guy #2: "Yeah, she is a total cheatmooch."

That guy is unemployed and lives off his 3 girlfriends. He's cheatmooching all of them!

BINGTSI

Abbreviation: \ˈbiŋ-sē\ Because It's Not Going To Suck Itself. Most commonly used when explaining one's reason(s) for doing a particular activity, esp. when the person asking just doesn't get it.

"Dude, why do you spend so much time in the gym?"
"BINGTSI."

See also: blow job, fellatio, head

Nyquilepsy

The sudden onset of sleepiness which occurs shortly after taking a dose of NyQuil.

I took some cold medicine last night and I don't remember falling asleep; I must've had Nyquilepsy.

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Pintlifter

pint·lifter | \ˈpīntlifter \
Noun (informal):
One who lifts pints of beer at a bar instead of weights in a gym; a soft-bodied person with a prominent beer gut who values partying and the consumption of alcohol, especially beer, over fitness and healthy eating.

“Sam is the stereotypical pintlifter; a prolific beer drinker who, on any given day, can be found in downtown bars showing off his nonathletic, unfit physique and prodigious ability to consume alcohol”