Fuck Lore

1. Sex advice shared verbally and handed down as truth. Usually spread by virginal 14 year old boys that wish to appear more sexually savvy than they actually are. This advice is not only ridiculous, but can often be dangerous.

2. Bragging about sexual exploits while talking to other men in order to foster an image of being a sexual tyrannosaurus. It is commonly accepted as being utter bullshit by the other people listening.

1. Dude, I heard that right after you fuck a skank bareback if you pee on your hands and scrub your dick with it, you'll totally not get herpes.

2. Jim: "Do you really buy that shit about him getting it on with her older sister and her friend?"
Marvin: "Fuck no man, that's just part of Tommy's fuck lore."

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Battleshits

A case of diarrhea that is accompanied by severe flatulence to such a degree that the sound resembles a naval ship firing its cannons.

Tom had Taco Bell last night, he got the battleshits so bad it sounded like the Battle of Midway in there. Kept me up all night.

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Coin Boy

1. A derogatory term used to describe someone that constantly loses on a pool table that requires coins to be inserted in order to rack up the balls and play another game.

2. Any NPC in an MMO game that can be easily killed and drops a substantial amount of in game money.

"Oh Coin Boy? fetch us another rack."

"Dude, I gotta go pwn the Coin Boy I need some vig for my mats."

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Blind Sausage

A game of skill and deception, wherein the man asks the woman to close her eyes, open her mouth and count to ten. The man now has exactly ten seconds to get balls deep in the woman's mouth. Extra points are awarded if he can discharge his wad before the ten seconds are up.

No points are awarded if the woman horks all over his knob.

I woke up and my girl was yawning, I told her to hold her breath for a ten count, I totally gave her the blind sausage, now I have to sleep on the couch for a week.

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Patient Zero

Typically an asshole that spends between five and ten minutes talking to you before mentioning casually that he/she is sick. Causing you to wonder if you've now been infected by what this mouth breathing fuck stick has. Usually its just the common cold, but it could just as easily be ebola.

I can't come in today, fuckin' Patient Zero there got me sick yesterday when he was breathing all over the coffee cups."

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Dork Knocker

Term used to describe a ponytail worn by a man who has gone totally bald on top but not the sides or back of his head. Usually grown to compensate for the baldness in hopes of still appearing virile to younger women. Similar to the comb over, but less obvious.

Commonly found on guys over 40 that work in comic book stores.

"Jesus, that old guy's got a a serious dork knocker going. Who's he trying to kid?"

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Clit Chisel

1. (noun) A particularly rigid erection that feels as though its hard as iron. This also applies to morning wood.

2. (verb) To repeatedly poke a woman's clitoris with the tip of the penis with short but powerful strokes, mimicking a sculptor chiseling away at a statue.

When Mary inquired about the dents in the mattress, John replied "Those are from my clit chisel."

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