Flashmob Sale

Unsanctioned, crowd-sourced 100% off sales on high-fashion clothing, handbags and accessories at stores such as Nordstrum and Neiman Marcus. Commonly referenced in mainstream media as "Grab-and-run robberies" or "organized retail theft," Flashmob Sales generally involve the redistribution of symbols of capitalist wealth in the order of hundreds of thousands of dollars, taken from icons of retail excess and redistributed to those in need of a fashion upgrade for the holidays.

Rumored to be inspired by the Bob Dylan lyric, "Steal a little and they throw you in jail, steal a lot and the make you king," the proponents of Flashmob Sales are under the apparent belief that if enough people steal a ton of items all at once, the internet will cheer them on and the police will simply go back to finding unarmed civilians to shoot for sport.

"Nice sweater? Is that made from recycled laundry lint?" "Thanks! Yeah, I got it a Flashmob Sale down at the Grove!"