brown taco

Taking a turd, laying it in a woman's vulva, then eating it.

"Don't mind my breath, I've been eating brown taco!"

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jaspers

Human sex-balls. Danglies.

"Open wide darlin', I've got a hankering to dunk my jaspers!"

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Oral Hersheiser

Taking a dump in a person's mouth while smacking them in the forehead with a "meat bat." While various penetrations are highly encouraged, a true Oral Hersheiser must not include sexual consummation, as the eponymous baseball player holds the record for most "scoreless innings."

"You haven't had Scheiße till you've had an Oral Hersheiser!"

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rectal benedict

when someone takes a crap in your mouth through a piece of canadian bacon.

Does anyone have a toothbrush? I just had a rectal benedict!"

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brown snatch

Verb. To pluck a turd from someone's anus. Common with impacted colons.

"Don't shake my hand; I've just pulled a brown snatch."

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brown tefillin

To take a crap on someone's hand and forehead. The scatalogical version of the orthodox religious practice.

"I got a brown tefillin when all I really wanted was a hug!"

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