Senior Scramble

The Senior Scramble is a two part definition, it involves a man and a woman, generally both having low self esteems. The Senior Scramble term can be associated with two people first meeting their senior year then quickly marrying, or it can be two people who have dated for a long time and have given up on finding someone they actually like and have given up on happiness, then they end up getting married immediately after college. Watching two students marry who don't truly like each other is a complete joy. Whether it's because they just met and the pressures to be popular are too strong, or they've dated for years and realize that their personalities are junk and everyone else has been taken by the Scramble... Either way, the non-scrambles get a free party out of the wedding reception and a good laugh as the marriage ends in divorce or everlasting sadness.

A.) Kyle: You don't think that I am a part of the Senior Scramble do you?
Tim: Kyle, look at it this way, you just met her senior year and you only think she's a gem because all the others have been picked over. It's just like when you go clothes shopping for shorts at the end of the summer, all the good stuff is taken and they're desperate for someone to take the merchandise. It seems like a deal at the time until the season starts over again. Unfortunately you are a part of the Senior Scramble.

B.) Chris: Hi Andy! Did you hear that Erika and I are getting married?
Andy: No, but I assumed so. You're both way to desperate and ugly to find another person, welcome to the Senior Scramble!

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Kalamazoo Contact

The act of ejaculating into a girls eye and then using a blow dryer to dry it on the cornea, making it hard like a contact lens.

Andrew: Hey Bryan, I noticed that your skank was walking around and knocking things over like she's blind.

Bryan: Yeah, I gave her a huge Kalamazoo Contact last night.

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