paypal'd

(1) Past tense of transitive verb "to paypal", i.e., to make a secure online transaction through electronic payment service Paypal.

(2) An excited utterance to proclaim on a music-obsessed web message board such as TermBo that you have already purchased a very recently announced new record, cassette, or other limited-availability merchandise item. This may be perceived by the poster to earn cred points especially if they reply "paypal'd!" within mere minutes of the original announcement being posted by the merchandiser.

(Def. 1)
Original thread post (posted mm/dd/yyyy at 2:00 pm):
I am now taking limited pre-orders for the new one-sided 12-inch EP by River of Electrocuted Slugs, featuring three original songs and their absolutely bonkers cover of "Chromosome Damage" by Chrome. Described by hot-shit bloggers as "the dystopic-dance/synthpunk answer to Electric Eels, or like a Beefheart-damaged Nervous Gender." Limited to 400, the first 100 orders will be on white/green splatter vinyl with an etching on side blank. No multiple orders, please. $13 ppd in USA...paypal funds to bluntsleazy (AT) xxxxx (DOT) com. International orders and distros, get in touch at same address.

first reply (posted mm/dd/yyyy at 2:01 pm):
PAYPAL'D!

(Def. 2)
Post A: "Halfway across the country on tour, my balls were itching so bad, but then it just sorta stopped, but then I smelled these gnarly fumes the next time I sat for a ruthless duke, and I was like...whoa...WTF is this filmy cocoon around my balls? It looked and felt just like Vic's Vapo-Rub! Some kinda white/gray viscous sebaceous secretion. But whatever, man...I was just glad that the pain of that itching was over. So as I sit here typing this to you now, I'm thinking of scraping this off and saving it for later.

Post B: "This sounds like the answer to my needs last time Drippy Kids went on tour. Save some for me, too, please!"

Post C: "Paypal'd!"

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buttcrack-shower

(n.) The dredging of a damp washcloth through the butt cleavage, esp. in lieu of a full-body shower, or as an insurance policy against a messy or T.P.-intensive post-duke wipe-job.

1. "I could smell my ass, but I didn't have time for a full shower. So, I had to take a buttcrack-shower."

2. "My alarm clock didn't wake me up in time for my proctologist's appointment, so I had to make do with a buttcrack-shower before flying out the door."

3. "I don't know what I ate to have such ruthless mudbutt, but I'd nearly filled the toilet bowl with tissue from wiping so much, and there was still more shit than one wad could handle. So, I took a butt-crack shower."

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midlord

1. n. A person who trolls people on both or either side of the political or ideological spectrum from a centrist position; 2. v. To argue or troll as a midlord. (Etym. A play on the word Edgelord.)

1a. Does your uncle really believe this electability crap, or is he just being a midlord?; 1b. Midlords often feign obtuseness as a way to dismiss arguments from progressives; 2. I just choose to ignore him when he is midlording.

girlfriend rock

The kind of music you listen to only because your girlfriend (or any girl(s) you like) does. When your macho friends flip through your record collection and quizzically ask why you have this winsome indie-pop record mixed in with your slovenly punk or your metal or whatever else you bro down to with your dude friends, "girlfriend rock" is the excuse you give. If they continue to make fun of you, ask them why they never get any? Or do they really enjoy jugga-lette hookups that much?

Dude 1: "What are these doing in your glove box...Blank Dogs? Belle and Sebastian???"

Dude 2: "Oh, that's what my girlfriend likes to listen to."

Dude 1: "You don't actually like this shit, do you?"

Dude 2: "Actually...for girlfriend rock, you can do a lot worse. Have you heard Real Estate?"

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yolo

In California's county of Yolo, west of Sacramento, many residents find it funny that our county's name has come to be a sort of meme of hip lingo. It's hilarious to think that beautiful people in NYC might wear shirts that say "YOLO" in giant letters when we have virtually no special reason to have any great local pride.

In fashionable boutiques in Brooklyn's Williamsburg section, track jackets which read "YOLO" sell for $100; but in Yolo County, California, the Chamber of Commerce lost thousands on a run of Yolo County tee-shirts that failed to spark any consumer interest.

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ruthless duke

(n.) A product of a bowel movement which is exceptional for its unusually large volume, ghastlier-than-usual odor, or extremely laborious (i.e., child-labor-like) effort to deliver, or any combination of those elements.

(1)
After a week of constipation, she shat such a ruthless duke that both ends breached the water line in the toilet bowl.

(2)
Roommate 1: "I'll be right back...I gotta go leak."
Roommate 2: "Ummm...you might wanna wait to go in there."
Roommate 1: (nearly gagging from the smell) "Fuckin' A, right...That must've been a ruthless duke, man!"

10👍 1👎

bourge-bag

(boozh-bag, n. {pl. bourge-bags}) A contraction of "bourgeois" and "douchebag" to suggest a smug, elitist upper-middle-class lifestylist or person who fancies his or her self as one, and who is self-consciously and publicly representing that lifestyle in their consumer choices including the media which they broadcast through forwards to their personal social media audiences. Perhaps unknowingly, bourge-bags are prone to display crassly classist attitudes in their superficial understanding of society, underlying a sense of liberal idealism which they also superficially understand.

This historically diverse blue-collar neighborhood has been gentrified by techies and bourge-bags who think they're doing the area a huge favor by attracting a Whole Foods Market and putting an old Latino market out of business.