Morford

A beautiful man with a luscious beard who will rule the galaxy within the next three years. By using his world history knowledge and Thriller-esque dance moves, no one will be able to stop the ALLRIIIIIIGGGHTT Awesomeness.

Guy 1: Dude, I used to be straight, but after seeing Morford I turned gay.
Guy 2: Same, he's just so beautiful.