May 12th

National Kiss Eli day

Eli: Guess what day it is!
Girl: it's May 12th, is it important?
Eli: it's only the national day to kiss me!
Girl:Well if you insist!

May 9th

The day were Joe tells his crush Eli, that he is in love with him.

Did you hear?
Since it's May 9th, Joe confessed his love to Eli.

May 11th

May 11th is the day when your friend, who is named something stupid like Joe, makes you do something stupid. And afterwards you're surprised that you are even alive.

Joe and Quan almost died because Joe wanted to go swimming in the middle of a tornado.

May 11th = Joe is a Dumbass

Tom Holland

The hottest dude you will ever see. I'm not gay but holy shit, I would let Tom Holland do lots of things to me. He is almost as good as Ryan Reynolds.

Eli: "Did you see Tom Holland's new movie?"
Random fellow:"Yea I liked it."
Eli: "Yea it made me want a threesome with Tom Holland and Ryan Reynolds."
Random fellow:"I think you need to get some help."

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