lagoon mice

A term used to delicately describe flushed tampons that show up in rural sewage lagoons. Once they float to the top of the lagoon they are white, fuzzy, and have tails.

Matt: What are all those white fuzzy things with strings?
Dan: Um...gross.
Kurt: Those are lagoon mice. Get back to work.

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lagoon whistle

A term used to delicately describe the flushed tampon applicators that show up in rural sewage lagoons. The cardboard or plastic applicator tips float and look like whistles.

Matt: What's the deal with all the whistles in the lagoon? Dan: Um...those aren't whistles!
Kurt: Those are lagoon whistles. Get back to work.