crap napkin

Basically...a crap napkin would be a napkin that you use to wipe the crap from your sphincter, which of course you would only do if you ran out of toilet paper. Therefore, a person (being a crap napkin) would be a tool, and not even a very good tool at that. A tool that you would only use if all other tools were used up. Like a wrench made out of twigs and rabbit shit.

Bob (to Herman the tool) - Shut up you little crap napkin...

Henry (to Herman the tool) - Yeah, why don't you go tickle your butthole somewhere else you giggling whore.

Herman the tool - (No comeback because he's just a shitty old crap napkin)