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A medical condition in which prolonged usage of Apple technology results in degenerative brain diseases. Applectomy is subsequently branched into a wide variety of symptomatic illnesses based on the level and type of exposure to Apple products.
Decreased Motor Cortex Stimulation: Prolonged usage of Apple's touch screen technology will result in the degeneration of the motor cortex. Resulting in a loss of fine motor skills and overall finger dexterity needed to finely manipulate items. Items such as a keyboard.
Appsosis: A debilitating mental illness brought about by chronic exposure to the Apple iPhone's third party applications causes dementia and neurosis among patients overly engrossed into their recently purchased "app".
I-Form Dyslexia: A learning disability that stems from habitual usage of Apple's "i" products i.e "iPod", "iPhone", "iMovie". Patients begin to refer to objects with the prefix lowercase "i". Referring to a pet dog as "iDog" or a friend as an "iFriend" is a sign of I-Form Dyslexia
Jim: Hey Sarah how are you doing today?
Sarah: *In profound vegetative state*
Jim: Sarah please stop using your iPhone, Please! Your family needs you...
Sarah: *In profound vegetative state*
Doctor: I'm sorry Jim but she's suffering from late stage applectomy. Her brain has atrophied from prolonged use of her iPhone.
Jim: God no....
59π 19π
A planned event, the primary focus of which is a variety of cheap beer is served to the guests. It is often a neighborhood event or welcoming party, normally held during the summer.
Jake: Leslie just sent me an invite to her beer social on the 21st.
Ian: Dude! your first beer social since moving here... You're going to meet a lot of really cool folks at Leslie's place.
Jake: I'm so excited!
19π 4π
A recent National Football League penalty call. Roughing the Brady occurs when a defensive player makes a now illegal defensive play on league poster boy, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady.
Roughing the Brady entered the league rulebooks after the 2008 NFL season in which Brady suffered a horrific knee injury against the Kansas City Chiefs. Subsequently, Brady was placed on injured reserve and was out for the season.
Concluding the 2008 season, NFL executives strictly sought to prevent teams from making defensive plays exclusively against New England Patriots quarterback, Tom Brady. In short, the proverbial yellow flag is thrown whenever Tom Brady is under extreme duress and is tackled. Afterward, the previous play is stricken and the opposing team is penalized. The particular rationale of this new officiating policy is somewhat unclear... but it is assumed the Patriots owner Robert Kraft and head coach Bill Belichick had a part in the creation of this new penalty call.
At the start of the 2009 NFL season, the league officiating crew put the "Roughing the Brady" call to extensive use. Notably, Week 4 of the 2009 season, with the Baltimore Ravens at New England, the officiating crew stymied several defensive plays made by the archetypal Baltimore defense with the "Roughing the Brady penalty.
Jeff the Titans Fan: What the heck! why is our safety Chris Hope getting fined $10,000.00 for a clean tackle against Tom Brady?
Steve the Titans Fan: Man that game was straight up embarrassing. A complete whitewash! Hell, the refs were calling roughing the Brady all day. Nowadays you ain't allowed to tackle, sack, or force a fumble on Brady. And I thought only the Steelers bribed refs.
Jeff the Titans Fan: That's some bullspit!
44π 7π
Spreading across the thoroughfares and avenues of gentrified and campus America; like an ungodly plague, the fixie hipster is sullying the image of cycling.
In layman's terms a fixie hipster describes the average hipster riding atop a fixed gear bicycle often termed as a fixie. Although the heritage of fixed gear cycling dates to professional couriers, messengers, and track cycling. It is unclear how this style of cycling became popular with fixie hipsters. However, it is generally believed that owning a fixed gear bicycle has been labeled "trendy" within hipster culture.
Lars: So I spent 300 dollars to get matte white Aerospokes on my pastel green fixie. It also has matching tape wrapped around the handlebars. It's the only way to ride these days. It's great when going across campus. It beats rolling around on those passΓΒ© free-wheelers.
Brett: Those are some nice decorations you got there Lars. What's the sprocket size on your bike?
Lars: umm 62....
Brett: Well, do you take it to the velodrome on the weekends? I bet that rig is pretty light. Real quick on the tracks!
Lars: uhh...I use it to go get a cappuccino.
Brett: Hey you might wanna put an additional braking mechanism on to decrease your braking distance. Don't wanna slam into things buddy.
Lars: Dude that'll destroy the minimalistic, bare bones aesthetic of my bike! It's a fixie bro! Besides I use my feet to brake for emergencies.
Brett: It's just for safety sake dude. Besides how the hell can you even ride a bike comfortably in those tight slacks and slip on shoes. God what a fixie hipster!
213π 43π
The latest installment of Nintendo's glorious franchise Mario Kart. Packed with challenging, addicting, and frantic gameplay for the Nintendo Wii. Returning to the classic one seater racing play compared to the previous experimental Double Dash. This new series is packed with a large array of carts and motorbikes. All your favorite characters plus a number of unlockable characters return to the tracks to duke it out Mario Kart style.
PROS:
- It's Mario Kart dude, it's supposed to be a frantic, wild affair
- The characters, Mario, Luigi, Peach need I say more?
- Multiplayer, suit up 2, 3, or 4 of your friends and battle for first place
- Online gameplay, Fighting players from around the world for the best lap times, first place and bragging rights.
- Large selection of carts and motorbikes. Although most of the available vehicles are gimmicky and extremely weak on the courses. It's best to stick with the carts or motorbikes with a good amount of top speed, quick acceleration, moderate amount of weight, and good handling.
Carts are best for race course like tracks where speed and acceleration are crucial. (i.e Luigi's Circuit, Peach Beach) Their secondary drift boost and extra weight is important when jockeying for position and breakaway speed. Go for a motorbike when you're facing hairpin turns and 90 degree corners. (i.e Rainbow Road, DK Mountain, Wario's Mine).
CONS:
- Overly random and luck based gameplay. It's frustrating and quite annoying to claw your way into 1st place only to be knocked back to 10th place with a random assault of items on the last lap. Watching your competition blow past you while you tumble off course from a blue shell, red shell and then getting slammed by a Bullet Bill is maddening.
One can compare Mario Kart Wii to NASCAR where restrictor plates and various restrictive measures are implemented to prevent a series wide margin victories. Everybody deserves a chance to win right? You might not be the best racer to grace the Wii Wheel but even you might land in 1st place given the right amount of chances.
Mario Kart Wii's narrow margins of victory ensure tight, competitive racing but it seemingly penalizes and curtails better racers for the ineptitude and inabilities of poor racers.
-Items, the bread and butter of the Mario Kart franchise. Everybody loves and loathes the items. Whether it was a mushroom that allotted you enough speed to rocket into 1st place or the despised blue shell that divebombed on top of you.
In Mario Kart Wii, items play an unfairly disproportionate role in the gameplay. Compared to previous installments, items played a much smaller role in the game. However, in Mario Kart Wii it's safe to say that items determine whether your going to win or lose. Now add on the fact that lower placed racers usually at or below 5th place are more likely to get powerful weapons that can affect everyone such as the Blooper, POW block, thunderbolt, multiple, mega or super turbo mushrooms, blue shells, and Bullet Bills. Whereas, higher placed racers usually at or above 4th place are less likely to get powerful items and are usually stuck with green shells, red shells, the occasional mushroom, fake item box and bananas.
Compounded onto this is the fact that items such as the POW block, Lightning, Blooper, and Bullet Bill occur at an annoyingly high frequency due to lower placed AI or human racers. Every Mario Kart Wii racer shares a tale of being screwed on the last lap by onslaught after onslaught of POW blocks, thunderbolts, and blue shells.
RATING: Given it's many design drawbacks, Mario Kart is an addictive game suitable for a group of friends or online play. Single play is frustrating given the luck based and randomness of AI gameplay. But overall it's worth the minor irritations of losing due to AI item onslaughts.
Mike: Dude I freakin hate Mario Kart Wii, the stupid AI always get POW Blocks and Bloopers. I can't race with such stupid AI programming. How is it possible for me to have such a great lead and fall back to 12th place on the last lap!!! It's like Nintendo doesn't want you to win or be the single victor. Freaking communist Japanese game developers.
Hank: That's just a part of the game Mike, you have to accept the fact the Mario Kart Wii isn't your run of the mill racing game. Yeah, it's built on goofy scales of luck and chances and the fact that I got screwed on the last lap by a blue shell is what keeps me playing.
Mike: Screw you, I'm going to play Burnout
134π 22π
A natural phenomenon by which bros intrinsically congregate. Modern science describes brovity using the general theory of brolativity in which brovitation is a consequence of the curvature of the space/bro fabric.
The curvature of the space/bro fabric is attributed to fact that a single bro has the propensity to naturally bend his relative locus. The bending of the space/bro fabric is a result of bromass. Under these circumstances, bros exert an attraction on one another.
*Empire State of Mind plays...*
Passerby: Whoa... what's going down at the Tau Phi Alpha house?
Another Passerby: I don't know... It's a Thursday night and there has to be at least 70 bros over there. What's the deal?
Speculative Onlooker: It's brovity. The universal law by which bros naturally exert an attraction to other bros. Three bros throw a beer social and in little time they'll attract more and more bros... Natural law my friends.
Passerby: Looks like a complete sausage fest.
21π 2π
An uninteresting youtube video typically featuring a hyper-active, annoying, yet physically attractive young woman. YouTube bimbos have inundated YouTube with asinine videos that typically convey worthless suggestions, assumptions, and information.
YouTube bimbos are usually female around the ages of 15-25. They are characterized as being quite attractive yet overly animated, and vacuous. Thus, the core philosophy of a YouTube bimbo is to emphasize their physical feminine assets and attributes to attract a large audience where video content would not.
A YouTube bimbo usually creates videos that are given strange titles that initially pique one's interest. Their YouTube videos usually pertain to inane subjects or broad sophomoric social topics.
The videography of a YouTube bimbo is notably "do it yourself" but some exceptions are made for more widely known YouTube bimbos with a large network of subscribers. In particular, video production involves the use of a webcam or personal video camera. Shots are usually taken from the head up. Usually, a YouTube bimbo is scantily clad; wearing a revealing outfit.
Widely known YouTube bimbos:
iJustine
LisaNova
lacigreen
hotforwords
111π 36π