Herbst Maneuver

An effective maneuver for when you have an extreme amount of intestinal gas causing pain or pressure. Usually this occurs after a first date, or an important event where you cannot be flatulent for an extended period of time.

To perform the maneuver, simply undress your lower half, sit on a toilet, and begin to slowly rock your body from side to side, bending over as far as you can, and holding for a moment at each side. Since your intestines are somewhat of a winding, circular structural path, this effectively helps the gas bubbles find their way out. Similar to the concept of how the Epley Maneuver treats Vertigo in the inner ear.

In 60 seconds of performing the Herbst Maneuver, the pain has subsided, I have lost two pant sizes, and can return class in time for the exam.

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Mesopootamia

When your poo is so large that it piles on the bottom, and breaches the surface; effectively creating a new land mass in your toilet.

Oh man, I may have just birthed a new life form with the mesopootamia I just laid.