Random
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Random
That odiferous, amalgam of shit and sweat around the anus. Known for its hallmark itch and prompting of an occasional re-wipe.
Got the worst case of ring butter. Just could not get my ass clean this morning and working out made the perfect combination.
The ring butter made the drive home a long itchy one.
I dug a little deep to itch the ring butter and gave myself one hell of a skid mark.
Gotsta do a corn drop.
That was a 40 minute corn drop. I’m 10 lbs lighter.
He did a corn drop and the shitter reeked like musky eggs for an hour.
The anus. The asshole. The bunghole.
Damn it sure is cold out. My hands are freezing. You are welcome to warm it up in my fudge pocket.
My neighbor came over last night. We got a little drunk and the next thing I know I’m face down and panties down on the coffee table getting my fudge pocket stretched.
A limp, flaccid penis.
Despite a half hour of oral, he was nothing but a lifeless limb. Whiskey Dick is real.
I beat dem gutz till I had nutted myself to a lifeless limb.
Rory tugged and tugged but his lifeless limb never would solute.
Catching a nasty STD from anal sex. Usually from a filthy whore or or prostitute.
What is it doc? I feel horrible and I think my cock is going to rot off.
Have you had anal?
Yes.
Was he or she clean?
No. She was a street walker and gave it up for $5 so I had to clap them cheeks. Wouldn’t you?
Ummmm. No. That’s nasty. You have the ass crack fever. Here is a script now go soak your penis in bleach.
A sock used for masturbation that’s so overused it’s as crusty a dried Elmer’s Glue. Found in nightstands, under beds, pillows and mattresses.
My elmer’s sock needs a wash. It’s unusable at this point.
My mom found my elmer’s sock and wanted some answers.
When you hook up with a smokin’ hot chick but you get home and find out she’s offer more than a lady and packing some serious heat (trap) But rather than bolting like a transphobic with a raging hard on sure to garner the blue balls, you settle for a vigorous old fashioned from her before grabbing an Uber and forgetting the whole thing ever happened.
I closed the bar down last night. Took home a smokin babe that was alone all night. But wound up handy trapped.