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When your uncle or cousin gives you an under the table hand job while gathered around for dinner at a festive family holiday gathering such as thanksgiving or Christmas. But any government recognized holiday applies.
I love it when my cousin comes in for Christmas. He gives the most vigorous family holiday handy. Only my uncle can tell what’s happening.
Using one’s own sock or socks to wash and wipe the asshole after dropping a horrifically mud butt style shit or accidentally shitting oneself and there is no toilet paper or other tissue.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
After spending the entire day drinking beer and eating hot wings, I headed home. After about a mile, I felt the gut bubblies. Hoping to release some pressure, I unloaded what I thought was a massive fart but ended up shitting my pants. I spotted a gas station on the corner and quickly headed to the shitter. I waddled to the door praying the steamy, oozing, wet lump would not slide any further down my leg. I made it to the stall only to find there was no toilet paper or paper towels. I slipped off both socks knowing a Texas wet wipe was my only alternative. I moistened them in the sink and then I slid the cold, wet socks up and down my ass crack like dental floss cleaning what had to look like the field at a tractor pull and a rooster’s tail when it came out. I got it as clean as I could get it and at least enough to not itch too much before I got home, I tossed my socks in the corner and slipped my boots back on and headed on my way.
Using one’s own sock or socks to wash and wipe the asshole after dropping a horrifically mud butt style shit or accidentally shitting oneself and there is no toilet paper or other tissue.
A Texas wet wipe is used out of absolute necessity and desperation.
The sock or socks are removed and are made thoroughly wet and moist in the sink (if available) and the ass is cleansed accordingly. The socks must always be disposed of or better yet, just left behind on the floor. Never flushed.
After spending the entire day drinking beer and eating hot wings, I headed home. After about a mile, I felt the gut bubblies. Hoping to release some pressure, I unloaded what I thought was a massive fart but ended up shitting my pants. I spotted a gas station on the corner and quickly headed to the shitter. I waddled to the door praying the steamy, oozing, wet lump would not slide any further down my leg. I made it to the stall only to find there was no toilet paper or paper towels. I slipped off both socks knowing a Texas wet wipe was my only alternative. I moistened them in the sink and then I slid the cold, wet socks up and down my ass crack like dental floss cleaning what had to look like the field at a tractor pull and a rooster’s tail when it came out. I got it as clean as I could get it and at least enough to not itch too much before I got home, I tossed my socks in the corner and slipped my boots back on and headed on my way.
A viscous of sexual fluids that glaze the penis during coitus. There are three forms of this delightful amalgam.
Oral meat glaze. The frothy concoction of saliva and eventually semen slathering a well sucked knob. Usually moistens the balls as well.
Vaginal meat glaze. The mixture of vaginal secretions, maybe squirt, and a hot load
of jizz vigorously churned inside her love pocket and coating the schlong. When wiped off, it often resembles a snail trail.
Rectal meat glaze. A brownish, lathered cream of ass juice, remnants, lube and semen. Creates a shaft sheen from tip to base. Is often ripe and pungent and may induce gagging during the natural wafting that occurs during cheek clapping.
That dirty slut left me with a thick meat glaze. So I wiped it off on her pillow case.
Male masturbation. Jacking off. A vigorous wank.
I’ll be there by 7:30. Just need to run home to shit, Shower, shave and bust knuckles.
I just started to bust knuckles when my aunt walked in.
I spent the weekend on porn hub and busting knuckles.
When one makes an expedition through a female’s laundry hamper hunting for a prized and coveted pair of soiled panties to sniff. A hamper safari is truly an adventurous exploration and exciting journey.
The party at the sorority house last night was an absolute hamper safari. My olfactory senses could not have been more satisfied.
Due to social distancing, simulating the performance of a traditional Turkey Slap by swinging the penis back and forth, 6 ft away from her face with no physical contact.
While not as physically satisfying as it would be under non-pandemic circumstances, the act of lovingly pseudo-slapping your partner in the face with an erect or semi erect penis is still a coveted tradition especially around Thanksgiving.
My hot cousin came to town for thanksgiving. While i normally would give her a Turkey slap after everyone went to bed, we kept our distance and had to settle for the covid Turkey slap instead. I gave her a little helicopter penis action as well.