Broccoli Dick

Broccoli Dick is rumored to be an extremely rare medical condition affecting the soft tissue that makes up the head of the human penis. The condition results in the erect penis resembling a stalk of broccoli. The only doctor to document cases is a Dr. Antonio Broccolini, known to his peers simply as Doc Broc. It is these two facts that likely contributed to the common name of the condition.

While the causes of the condition are not totally understood, Doc Broc has offered the most commonly accepted theory on its origins. Physiologically, it is very similar to cauliflower ear, in which rough treatment or trauma to the ear causes a swelling and deformation. Extremely rough treatment or disregard for the well being of an erect penis will eventually cause Broccoli dick. Fibrous and fatty tissues are deposited at the head of the penis during the healing process. While no photographs have been found to date, the resemblance to a stalk of broccoli is said to be remarkable. Extreme alcohol abuse is a factor in 96% of cases as well.

It is also curious that the vast majority of cases are in the North Georgia area after long weekends at a lake house. Claims that there is a parasitic or viral cause have not been substantiated. Doc Broc has attributed the connection to the culture of reckless abandon and alcohol abuse in the region, and the physical toll a prolonged weekend can take on particularly irresponsible males.

The condition is considered a badge of honor.

At first she was afraid of my broccoli dick, but then she grew to love it.

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