Schlong

A schlong is a massive veiny hairy monster of a penial object. Keep out of reach of small children

"Bro did you see that horses giant long schlong. its was beautiful"

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Shroud of Urine

Mount your lady friend from behind & grab her arms submission-style. 1/2-way through, switch to the no-no hole so she starts crying. Pull out and pee on her head. Mash her face into the pillow so it leaves a make-up/tear/urine face on the fabric.

"After I gave Barb a shroud of urine last night, I made her wash the pillow cover while I watched the game. Bitch knows better than to leave a stain."

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