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AN INTENSE NAP TAKEN BY GEEZERS
ED AND I TAKE A STRAWBERRY NAP EVERY DAY
1π 1π
An older man who used to kiss his wife very often when they were dating. But now has lost the pleasure of kissing. One 'Pickles' strip showed Earl and Opal fighting because he no longer kissed her. This was what lead to the Romance Rooster (Pickles July 25, 2004)
Opal: Hey Earl, you never kiss me anymore. I wonder why?
Earl: I guess I forgot how. I used to be a Romance Rooster.
Opal: I know. Those romantic dates we had back in 1945, I miss those to death.
Earl: Well, how about we have one tonight? Maybe, we can bring the Romance Rooster back. Maybe we can get some magic!
4π 2π
The psychological condition suffered by many fans of the comic strip 'The Middletons' when Beatrice Middleton is not seen in the strip. Symptoms of this include, but are not limited to: intense sadness, thoughts of 'Where is she?', and most importantly 'Why is she not here?'. This causes much depression. The only known cure is intense exercise or massages using Martian Mud, which is Beatrice Middleton's favorite massage cream.
Beatrice: What's wrong honey? You look sad. I know what it is, its Middleton's Disease, right?
Bryant: Yes, you haven't been in the strip for days. Where were you? I was beginning to think you'd never show.
Morris: Buddy, she can't be in every strip. She's got to have a break once in a while. She's your Gunny Granny, for crying out loud.
Midge: (laughing) You know, he's right. Just because she isn't in the strip doesn't mean she isn't here. (picks up a jar of Martian Mud) Do you want me to use this? You love it when Beatrice does it.
Bryant: A massage? You'd actually give me a Martian Mud massage? Okay, just make sure you go all over my body. That's the best one.
Beatrice: That's one way to cure it. Hey sweetie, there's a soccer game going on later. And I'm coaching it. Want to come?
Bryant: Sure, maybe we could bring Grandpa Hec and Grandma Flo. But would I still be sad if I came?
Beatrice: No, you wouldn't be sad. Middleton's Disease is tough, I know. But you'll get over it quickly. (she starts massaging Bryant with the Martian Mud) There you go, sweetie. Now, isn't that better? I love you, honey. And I always will. A Gunny Granny's gotta do what a Gunny Granny's gotta do.
67π 4π
A sweatsuit that is worn by Ed Crankshaft. Actually, it is made of his everyday clothes which include the following: red jacket, white dress shirt, black pants, white socks, and often black oxfords, but also sometimes white sneakers. The sneaker version was most recently worn the other day. Its a great outfit for everyday wear but also for exercise as well. Take it from a former Mudhen, if you want great clothes wear when the workout bug shoots, grab a Cranksuit, its a hoot!
Ed: Whoa, its a great day for a workout! I'd better get my Cranksuit on.
Pam: You wear your Cranksuit all the time. What's so special about working out in it?
Ed: Well, all you have to do is add sneakers and it goes into a sweatsuit. I love this baby! (bends over and touches his toes)
Mac: Hey, you two, what's up? I saw you exercising and I wanted to join in the fun. Look, I got my Mudhens on!
Ed: (still stretching himself) Sure, you don't have to have a Cranksuit. Is that one of my old Mudhen suits?
Mac: Yeah, I snuck into your house and grabbed one out of your closet. I hope you don't care.
Ed: Yeah, whether you have a Cranksuit or not its a great day to stretch! First one to the hot dog stand is a dirty Mudhen!
Pam: (starts laughing) Dad, you're gonna get it! Watch out! (she starts jogging after him) You dirty bird!
Mac: Now, now, now. Don't say that. I love him! He looks good in his Cranksuit.
Ed: Whew, what a workout! How about some hot dogs? My treat.
Being very easily frustrated as if by one's wife or husband. Used and named after Ralph and June Drabble.
Ralph was running on the treadmill when June walked by and accidentally unplugged the cord, causing Ralph to become extremely Drabbled.
A milk beverage made by Liv Hatley. Made by mixing fresh carrot in a glass of milk. Used to give energy to people before going running. Can also be made with many other vegetables. Was first made on December 22, 2011. This is delicious to drink before exercise or after them as well. If you want a drink that is smooth as silk try Liv Hatley's famous Carrot Milk.
Liv: Hey sweetie, do you feel like going running? I already stretched and did my warm ups. And I got a treat for you when you're done.
Ben: What is it? Its not carrot cake again?
Liv: No, even better! Its Carrot Milk! You just take a glass of milk and mix fresh carrots with it.
Ben: (takes off running) Oh sweet! This is going to be good.
Liv: It sure will! One of the best energy shakes you ever drank. And I know what I'm talking about. I've been coaching you for years. You are going to love this!
Ben: (jogs back to her) Whew! That was a workout-and-a-half. I need something creamy.
Liv: Here, drink this Carrot Milk. That's delicious! I'll try it out on the grandkids, too. They might love it.
Ben: (starts doing Hatley Squats) Wow! This stuff is silky. Carrot Milk rules!
A workout done inside a chapel by Catholic priests. This was first done by SFC. Fr. Roger Stainglass when he's preaching a sermon. It mostly consists of three exercises called "God Squats", "Lord Lunges", and "Jehovah Jacks". Usually they are done in three or four rounds in quick succession. A circuit of this always ends by kneeling on the prayer bench and saying one Hail Mary before the next circuit begins. Stainy does this in the mornings before the early service. So if you want a religious workout that will really perk you, try a Communion Circuit - it can't hurt you! Stainy Stainglass said so!
Stainy: Hey Bryant, you feel like some exercise? Let's do our Communion Circuit. I need some stretches.
Bryant: Sure! Gotta have those warm up exercises now. I love these!
Stainy: Okay! First one, lets do some God Squats. (he stands in front of the prayer bench and squats down) Easy. Now hold it too long. Just stand there until it starts to burn.
Bryant: Wow! Good one. What's next?
Stainy: Next up is the Lord Lunge. You know how we priests kneel on one knee? You do that and then you quickly stand up again. That's the second part of a Communion Circuit. (he does a Lord Lunge to show Bryant)
Bryant: What's the third part?
Stainy: The Jehovah Jack. You jump up on top of the prayer bench and you do a couple of jumping jacks. Then you jump down and pray a Hail Mary. And then the circuit starts all over again. Great workout, huh?
Bryant: Yes, but after you do it is there a stretch that you do?
Stainy: Sure it is. The Saintly Stretches. Here, hold my hand. How, stretch all the way up into the sky. There sweetie. That's it. Communion Circuits rock, don't they?
Bryant: They sure do! They wake you up. I love doing these. They're better than Knee Mail!