oldthinker

A newspeak word invented by george orwell in his book 1984.

An oldthinker is one who clings to old or outmoded ways of thought. Orwell defines it as, "... typical sentence .... as 'Oldthinkers unbellyfeel Ingsoc'. The shortest rendering that one could make of this in Oldspeak would be: 'Those whose ideas were formed before the Revolution cannot have a full emotional understanding of the principles of English Socialism.' But this is not an adequate translation.....

Used by geeks in a perjorative way about anyone who is not techno-savvy.

"My Dad's a real Oldthinker - he won't even have a mobile phone !"

"Come the Revolution, all you Oldthinkers will be put up against a wall and shot !"

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Sith Tzu

A Shih Tzu which has turned to the Dark Side of the Force. Since they are highly intelligent, mischevious and arrogant anyway, this is but a small step. Many Shih Tzu look like small hairy versions of Yoda anyway.

"That... that .... er ... dog ? life form ? what ? has just stolen my mobile phone from my jacket pocket and hidden it under the sofa !"

"Sorry, he's a Sith Tzu..... he can't resist being evil."

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Total replacement therapy

When something is so badly damaged that the only option is to get a new one; it might be a critical component, or the whole thing.

"Can you fix it ?"

"No. Your hard drive is screwed. Total replacement therapy is indicated."

"Bugger !"

Electra glide

A model of motorcycle manufactured by Harley Davidson

"What's that bike ?"

"Owwwww ... that's an original Electra Glide .... monkey see, monkey want ..."

redlining

Running a piece of equipment, most often an engine or other powerplant, way beyond it's rated maximum, usually in an emergency situation.

Usually, denoted by taking the engine revs or temperature up into the red area on an indicator dial, risking permanent damage or catastrophic failure.

"How fast will that thing go ?"

"One fifty five, but after one forty you'll be redlining"

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Suicider

Very, very strong rough cider, sometimes as much as 10% alcohol by volume - 8% is not uncommon. Can range in taste from innocuously fruity and bland to eye-wateringly sharp.

"What do you want ?"

"I'll have a pint of Bideford Brainblaster".

"Are you mad ? That stuff's suicider !"

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Cancer crystals

White sugar; can be applied to salt, brown sugar, sweetener, but most usually to white sugar, on the basis that "everything" - sugar, sweetener, coffee, red meat, water, oxygen and light will cause cancer (eventually).

Taking all available information into account, the only way to avoid dying of cancer is to forswear all food and drink, and shut yourself in an airtight lead box. You won't die of cancer. You will still die, and quite quickly, but it won't be of cancer.

"Coffee's done. Milk and sugar ?"

"No milk, but gimme two spoons of cancer crystals".