Thomas

A Thomas is an interesting creature. If you find one, it is highly advisable that you stay away because he is going through a worse identity crisis than anyone you have ever met. He is going through the dilemma of choosing between "Thomas," "Tommy," or "Tom" because he is too uncreative to come up with a name that deviates further than "Tim." He is forced in to the dilemma of choosing whether he wants the be a train, a kid, or a german porn star and he would be better off if someone just told him to use his online username. All in all, a Thomas is someone who can't make up their identity and should not be asked for advice on any major dilemma.

Guy1: "You see that Thomas over there?"
Guy2: "Yeah? He seems pretty deep in thought."
Guy1: "He's just in one hell of an identity crisis. I hope he decides on the name 'Tom;' I can see him making it big in the german porn market."

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