Fap Captain

Literal: Someone who masturbates more than they have sexual intercourse.

Slang: A male who masturbates to *excess*.

*Considered to the general public to be more than sixteen times a week.

Tom: Is John coming with us to the bar later?

Billy: No- I bet he's busy at home choking the chicken again, that horny bastard.

Tom: What a Fap Captain.

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