Committed Helmsmanship

1) The act of driving in a particularly "good guy" style, for example at high speed or with complete disregard for the rules of the road and the well being of other road users.

or

2) Particularly vigourous and repeated masturbation.

1) Tikky-Toku's helmsmanship was particularly committed during the 2004 European Grand Prix - or - Mister Rash displayed impressively committed helmsmanship en route to Forli airport.

2) ANGUS's helmsmanship was so committed his nob fell off after seeing the latest SPLANGUS video.

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Franz Ferdinand

Austro-Hungarian Monarch. Shot. Dead. WW1. So they say.

- or -

Pish and mystifyingly popular Scottish Band that are this month's 'band du jour' among Britain's alt-art "yeah I'm so trendy and with it" cognoscenti. Alternative enough to be acceptable to the educated middle classes and students, but sufficiently lacking in originality to have mass appeal among brain-dead assholes who like whatever happens to be trendy. Destined for fleeting success followed by half-hearted follow-ups of marginal artistic credibilty and only fringe appeal. Popular among people who punctuate sentences randomly with the word "like".

I went to a totally like underground Franz Ferdinand concert and only like really clever people who get it were there because it wasn't advertised except on the internet like and in a coded advert in The List that you had to be a totally clever like fan to understand. And I was there so I said the guy, I was like "I'm like your biggest fan and I knew you all before you were like really popular" and he was like "oh really well why don't you come in for like free then" and I was like "yeah" and I got in like totally free. It was so cool just like being so much like everyone else but in a totally like original and alternative way yeah.

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Assitalia

Ass + Italia = Assitalia

Describes the characteristic shape of an attractive Italian chick's posterior / ass.

For example:

"Check out the assitalia on her!"
Va Fan Culo

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Angry Little Man Syndrome

An illness afflicting men of modest stature who feel that their masculinity is undermined by their shocking lack of inches - so to speak. Common symptoms include excessive shouting, hyperactive kicking, randomly swung punches, inflated hair styles, loud attire, random screaming of "ah fukkin' seen ye" or "aye ye fukkin' did", a pre-emptive approach to taking the piss, getting into fights on work nights out, and furious RAGE caused by Martin Hedley, the nob-end.

Mr. Boyd suffered from Angry Little Man Syndrome due to the flattened nature of his footwear. He attemped to compensate with huge tie knots, hyperactive behaviour and a pre-emptive piss take strategy.

-or-

My former chemistry teacher suffered from Angry Little Man Syndrome because he was a snivelling worm who abused his wife.

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Dillion

Phrase uttered by Glaswegian neds (see Ned) to express a variety of emotions / impluses / thoughts (if thinking is possible when strung out on Schweeties) including:
1) punch / beat up someone
2) indicate admiration for a female or car or fish supper.
3) indicate an extreme degree of the succeeding adjective / verb / noun.
Commonly preceeded by the word "pure".
First know use circa 1995 in a chippie in Maryhill Road - "Joahnny, dillion him" - now a common ned word used in any number of situations.

As in...
1) Ah'm gonnae pure dillion you, ya fuckin' dobbur!
2) Check oot that bird Donna-Marie, sheeza pure dillion - or - haw haw look at that E.V.O. (i.e. Mitsubishi evo) itza pure dillion. - or - haw brullyint, this chippie does a pure dillion roll and chip wi buckie, no?
3) You're a pure dillion bawbag. - or - haw they versace trackies are pure dillions - or - ah pure love Donna-Marie's sovvy rings, they're pure dillions.

Etc. etc.

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senga

Pure dillion shenga, naw! Man she'sh pure hot ash fuck.

see above.

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Nobulator

A person similar in personality or behaviour to a nob.

That guy is such a nobulator

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