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Your statline is how many alcoholic beverages you've consumed followed by how many times you've smoked marijuana, in a specified time period (typically one day). Always stated in a "_-_" format when written via text message, and when spoken verbally sports slang is used (I.e. 3 beer and 2 joints is known as 3-2, or trip-dub). Also known simply as "stats".
Via text:
Guy 1: _-_ ?
Guy 2: 4-2
Guy 1: Whoa dude, you must be really high
Guy 2: Yeah..
In person:
Guy 1: *Guy 2 arrives late to party* Yo man! What's your statline!?
Guy 2: I've already put up a triple-double!
Guy 1: Haha man I'm seven-nothing, you got any dope?
16👍 1👎
A pointless and mundane monthly "report" a Xerox Inside Sales Executive must write to his/her Account General Manager. Although extremely pointless and hollow, it is viewed as a critical report by upper management to "prove one's worth". Similar to TPS reports only dumbed down a bit.
Brett (Manager): Carol, I noticed you were #1 in sales this month and hit all of your monthly targets; that said, you didn't complete your AGM Report by the 4th like I asked you too so thus you are not the Employee of the Month.
Worker 1: Hey man did you do up your AGM report yet?
Worker 2: What's the point of those anyways.
Worker 1: I dunno', it seems as though its another bullshit "make work" project assigned by management.
2👍 1👎
The end of the measuring tape that starts at zero. All an individual has to do is hold the "dummy end", while the other person stretches out the measuring tape and does the actual measuring. Commonly used to describe a complete moron that is incompetent at a given task.
Roger: Uhh Scott I noticed you ate your steak with a knife and spoon earlier, so why don't you hold the dummy end of the measuring tape and I'll measure.
Scott: Cool..!
Justin: Man, did you see Mr. MacCormack the other day shoveling his driveway!? He was using a fuckin' icepick!
Tristan: Haha yeah, he definitely holds the dummy end
8👍 1👎
When two or more friends engage in average friendly banter/conversation, casually.
So there we were, just a few average friends sitting around chewing gum with some casual laughs and stock conversation topics.
Timothy: What were you up to last night, Michael?
Michael: Oh not much, just hung out with some average friends and exchanged standard, run-of-the-mill stories about generalizations.
5👍 1👎
Knowingly keeping a third parties item/belongings once its rightful owner is found. More or less indirectly stealing something. To Ekaiser someone is to not relinquish previously unclaimed goods once the rightful owner has come forward.
Guy 1: Hey I know I gave you that Armani blazer that was left at my house after the party, but I found out it was Jimmy's brothers coat after all and he wants it back
Guy 2: Yeah well you did give it to me, tough luck pal you're not getting it back
Guy 1: You're a fucking grease-ball, way to Ekaiser his brother man
A place so miserably boring and mind-numbing it feels like you've spent an entire week at said place, all in one afternoon.
Example 1
Ronnie: I was down in Parrsboro this weekend.
Fred: Parrsboro? *quietly under breath* I spent a week there one afternoon..
Ronnie: What's that?
Example 2
Guy 1: Have you ever been to Northwest Wisconsin?
Guy 2: As a matter of fact I spent a week there one afternoon.
Guy 1: Haha, yeah, it was boring as fuck.
Unclaimed item/belongings that have been left at a party unintentionally by an individual (i.e. jacket, hat). Often times the host of the party will have a grace period for when the said person can come back and retrieve their item/belongings, however once this period passes the party host assumes ownership of the goods and can alternatively give it away. "The 8 day grace period"
Matthew: Check out these party leftovers; a hat, scarf, and a woman's size 3 Armani blazer.
Erin: That's my favorite size and my favorite brand of blazers - may I take this blazer?
Matthew: Haha, well it is pass the 8 day grace period so it's yours now.