diamond foreskin

A condition of mental toughness and resiliency for men. When a man is so woke, and tired of the bullshit, he is said to have a diamond foreskin.

Men who cannot be hurt by words.

“She tried to break him, but she forget he’s got a diamond foreskin.

“Brah, you can’t crack a diamond foreskin”

fluggleport

The kind of person you just can’t even around. Ever.

“Fucking Fluggleport.”

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squeezing the sponge

When an ex asks for more money for things that should already be covered by child support.

Also when an ex files for child support arrears despite being fully paid.

“She’s got him by the balls and really squeezing the sponge for that orthodontist bill.”

“She spent all the child support on a new truck for her boyfriend, now she’s squeezing the sponge to pay for the kid’s summer clothes”

“The County takes half your income even if you’re caught up. They really squeeze the sponge”

make believe armor

The imaginary armor for a man that protects him from false “me too” accusations and/or abuse from women.

Very similar to a customer service face, make believe armor helps men interact with women and navigate the treacherous world of women’s rights.

While wearing make believe armor men can interact and simply talk with women without fear of reprisal or false accusations.

Typically make believe armor is worn at social activities such as dancing and parties but can and should probably be worn in the workplace or even at home.

While wearing make believe armor men are only able to talk about subjects that nothing sexual, sexist or overly masculine undertones or microaggressions can be taken away from ie the weather, sports stats, Wild Animal facts, and marinade recipes. Also things that are very technical like database building or power generation or ballistics.

*Make believe armor doesn’t actually exist except in the mind of a man or in other men.

“Hey Ma’am ”
“Hey Sir”

“The sun has reached it’s zenith and the temperature is warmer”
“Would you say it is hot?”
“No Ma’am I would not, because I’m wearing my make believe armor, I would say it’s certainly not cold”

“Dude won’t even talk about anything but the third law of thermodynamics to that girl, he’s wearing his make believe armor”

“I’m sorry Jill I would ask you to dance, but I’m wearing my make believe armor so what do you think of Tom Brady’s completion record?”

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Flirting

Ancient warfare women use to destroy men by inflating or deflating men’s egos in order to make them feel attractive or inadequate.

Also known as seduction.

That woman has been flirting with her boss all morning.

She only flirts with married men.

We caught this one flirting with her boyfriend’s best friend.

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vampire mother

A divorced women who sucks the life and wealth out of her ex husband after cheating and leaving. Highly abusive toward men and blames them for their behavior.

The worst of all baby mamas.

“Vampire Mothers are real.”

“Vampire Mother got paid today!”

“No I don’t want to talk to you about my life now and I don’t have anymore money to give you...you Vampire Mother”

Popcorned

A nice way to say stop talking especially if you’re beating a point to death. It’s like a safeword for too much talking about a subject matter or too much talking in general. Just like popcorn which burns easy after 2 min, good conversations need a safe way out of they are going too long but need to not be rushed either

Person 1: “Blah blah blah, blah blah, blah blah blah blah...blah blah blah, and blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Blah (2 min later) blah”
Person 2: “Popcorned!”
Person 1: “Ah, ok.”