Assnapped

slang used to describe the past tense of the act of assnapping; the act of kidnapping a person with the primary motive involving their buttocks

Steve: "What are you doing?!"

Joseph: "I'm kidnapping you and your pink, perfect ass!"

Steve: "Help, I'm being assnapped by the booty bandit!"

Blue headed molestation monkey

to refer to someone as a morally bankrupt, corrupt and sexually exploitative individual under a facade of being morally sound and generous to those who are weaker and in need; used to describe someone who is a member of the UN peacekeepers

I can't Steven became a UN peacekeeper and raped a 13 year old girl in that third world country, fuckin 'blue headed molestation monkey'.