Playing cricket for Dorset

An expression referring to teenagers engaging in a practice session in the grounds of the Broadstone Cricket Club after close of play.

“Are Kate and Len coming to the pub later?”
“No, they’re playing cricket for Dorset”

split infinity

The naked female partner assumes a resting horizontal position on a bed or similar comfortable surface (NB not a beach). She may be face down or face up. On the request of her male partner, she opens her legs to the fullest extent possible, exposing her intimate areas, folds and orifices to his gaze, inspection and physical touch. With commitment and the assistance of a physiotherapist it may be possible to gradually extend the legs to a maximum degree, but care should be taken not to damage the hips or femur.

“So why did you give me 6 sessions with a physiotherapist, a torch, and a magnifying glass for my birthday Frank?”

“I wanted to loosen your hips up so that you can increase your split infinity and I can get a better view babe! Hand me the magnifier and the torch before we reach the sun deck.”

Root Lashes

The sensation at the root of the male organ at full insertion, when contact is made with any pubic hair on the labia majora.

“Don’t let Francesca wax your nunu this week babe, I just love those root lashes.”

Grip ‘n Growl

In forward facing intercourse, adopting cowgirl position, when the ridden gentleman reaches round to squeeze the lady’s buttocks and as they are held and slightly parted she emits (voluntarily or involuntarily) wind.

Keep your hands to y’self Frank - last nights grip ‘n growl was bloody embarrassing.